Post Whoring Newbie Thread
Banned
MotoGP
Joined: Aug 2007
Posts: 5,942
From: Lake View Terrace, CA
Towards the end of the golf course, Dave hit his ball into the woods and
found it in a patch of pretty yellow buttercups. Trying to get his ball
back in play, he ended up thrashing just about every buttercup in the patch.
All of a sudden, POOF! In a flash and puff of smoke, a little old woman
appeared. She said, 'I'm Mother Nature! Do you know how long it took me
to make those buttercups? Just for doing what you have done, you won't
have any butter for your popcorn for the rest of your life: better
still, you won't have any butter for your toast for the rest of your life. As a matter of fact, you'll never have any butter for anything the rest of your life!'
Then POOF! She was gone!
After Dave recovered from the shock, he hollered for his friend, 'Fred, where are you?'
Fred yells back. I'm over here in the ***** willows.'
Dave shouts back, 'DON'T SWING, Fred
FOR THE LOVE OF GOD, DON'T SWING!'
found it in a patch of pretty yellow buttercups. Trying to get his ball
back in play, he ended up thrashing just about every buttercup in the patch.
All of a sudden, POOF! In a flash and puff of smoke, a little old woman
appeared. She said, 'I'm Mother Nature! Do you know how long it took me
to make those buttercups? Just for doing what you have done, you won't
have any butter for your popcorn for the rest of your life: better
still, you won't have any butter for your toast for the rest of your life. As a matter of fact, you'll never have any butter for anything the rest of your life!'
Then POOF! She was gone!
After Dave recovered from the shock, he hollered for his friend, 'Fred, where are you?'
Fred yells back. I'm over here in the ***** willows.'
Dave shouts back, 'DON'T SWING, Fred
FOR THE LOVE OF GOD, DON'T SWING!'
the boss
SuperBike
SuperBike
Joined: Mar 2010
Posts: 1,182
From: largo,fl
Towards the end of the golf course, Dave hit his ball into the woods and
found it in a patch of pretty yellow buttercups. Trying to get his ball
back in play, he ended up thrashing just about every buttercup in the patch.
All of a sudden, POOF! In a flash and puff of smoke, a little old woman
appeared. She said, 'I'm Mother Nature! Do you know how long it took me
to make those buttercups? Just for doing what you have done, you won't
have any butter for your popcorn for the rest of your life: better
still, you won't have any butter for your toast for the rest of your life. As a matter of fact, you'll never have any butter for anything the rest of your life!'
Then POOF! She was gone!
After Dave recovered from the shock, he hollered for his friend, 'Fred, where are you?'
Fred yells back. I'm over here in the ***** willows.'
Dave shouts back, 'DON'T SWING, Fred
FOR THE LOVE OF GOD, DON'T SWING!'
found it in a patch of pretty yellow buttercups. Trying to get his ball
back in play, he ended up thrashing just about every buttercup in the patch.
All of a sudden, POOF! In a flash and puff of smoke, a little old woman
appeared. She said, 'I'm Mother Nature! Do you know how long it took me
to make those buttercups? Just for doing what you have done, you won't
have any butter for your popcorn for the rest of your life: better
still, you won't have any butter for your toast for the rest of your life. As a matter of fact, you'll never have any butter for anything the rest of your life!'
Then POOF! She was gone!
After Dave recovered from the shock, he hollered for his friend, 'Fred, where are you?'
Fred yells back. I'm over here in the ***** willows.'
Dave shouts back, 'DON'T SWING, Fred
FOR THE LOVE OF GOD, DON'T SWING!'
hahahahahahaha that was funny as hell
Senior Member
MotoGP
Joined: May 2008
Posts: 3,452
From: San Clemente, CA
Towards the end of the golf course, Dave hit his ball into the woods and
found it in a patch of pretty yellow buttercups. Trying to get his ball
back in play, he ended up thrashing just about every buttercup in the patch.
All of a sudden, POOF! In a flash and puff of smoke, a little old woman
appeared. She said, 'I'm Mother Nature! Do you know how long it took me
to make those buttercups? Just for doing what you have done, you won't
have any butter for your popcorn for the rest of your life: better
still, you won't have any butter for your toast for the rest of your life. As a matter of fact, you'll never have any butter for anything the rest of your life!'
Then POOF! She was gone!
After Dave recovered from the shock, he hollered for his friend, 'Fred, where are you?'
Fred yells back. I'm over here in the ***** willows.'
Dave shouts back, 'DON'T SWING, Fred
FOR THE LOVE OF GOD, DON'T SWING!'
found it in a patch of pretty yellow buttercups. Trying to get his ball
back in play, he ended up thrashing just about every buttercup in the patch.
All of a sudden, POOF! In a flash and puff of smoke, a little old woman
appeared. She said, 'I'm Mother Nature! Do you know how long it took me
to make those buttercups? Just for doing what you have done, you won't
have any butter for your popcorn for the rest of your life: better
still, you won't have any butter for your toast for the rest of your life. As a matter of fact, you'll never have any butter for anything the rest of your life!'
Then POOF! She was gone!
After Dave recovered from the shock, he hollered for his friend, 'Fred, where are you?'
Fred yells back. I'm over here in the ***** willows.'
Dave shouts back, 'DON'T SWING, Fred
FOR THE LOVE OF GOD, DON'T SWING!'
With the Ducks losing 5 to 1 to San Jose in the 3rd period, I started browsing the Forum, and that gave me a good needed laugh.
Senior Member
MotoGP
Joined: Jul 2010
Posts: 3,871
From: Phoenix, AZ
A couple of young fellers were fishing at their special pond off the beaten track when out of the bushes jumped the Game Warden. Immediately, one of the boys threw his rod down and started running through the woods like a bat out of hell, and hot on his heels came the Game Warden.
After about a half-mile the fella stopped and stooped over, with his hands on his thigh's to catch his breath, and the Game Warden finally caught up to him.
"Let's see yer fishin' license, boy," the Warden gasped.
With that, the fella pulled out his wallet and gave the Game Warden a valid fishing license. "Well, son," said the Game Warden, "you must be about as dumb as a box of rocks! You don't have to run from me if you have a valid license!"
"Yes, sir," replied the young feller, "but, my friend back there - Well, he don't have one."
After about a half-mile the fella stopped and stooped over, with his hands on his thigh's to catch his breath, and the Game Warden finally caught up to him.
"Let's see yer fishin' license, boy," the Warden gasped.
With that, the fella pulled out his wallet and gave the Game Warden a valid fishing license. "Well, son," said the Game Warden, "you must be about as dumb as a box of rocks! You don't have to run from me if you have a valid license!"
"Yes, sir," replied the young feller, "but, my friend back there - Well, he don't have one."
Senior Member
MotoGP
Joined: Jul 2010
Posts: 3,871
From: Phoenix, AZ
Damn work is holding me hostage again. Not complaining that I have work or anything, but these boneheads aren't even humanistic about it.
I just need to punch a baby seal and be done with it. They don't even have seals here, much less baby ones...
I just need to punch a baby seal and be done with it. They don't even have seals here, much less baby ones...
Last edited by 7moore7; Nov 10, 2010 at 04:40 PM.
