Like a ghastly specter from darkest nightmares, the OEM seat has returned from the grave seeking vengeance. I thought it had been banished to the blackness of the abyss for good, but nay, it was only for an epoch.

Features:
*Seat pan forged by LUCIFER himself, left unpadded to inflict the greatest pain
*Genuine leather-like covering provides maximum chafing

I am reaching the end of my strength, as the madness contained within this dark artifact threatens to consume me. I cannot merely throw this adamantine seat on the trash pile, lest some unwary passer by become transfixed by its lightless glow and attempts to mount it. No, I must only give this to one with the courage to look into the bloodshot eyes of insanity, one with the strength to master it. A wizard with the cunning to master this beast gains an ally of unspeakable power: the ultimate theft deterrent. The moment a thief straddles the evil object his fate is sealed. Eager for revenge upon mortals, the seat will visit his posterior with blisters that rival the torment of fire and brimstone or the eruptions of Vesuvius... a lesson not soon forgotten. This same fate will befall any unworthy mortal who in his arrogance, attempts to mount the saddle of doom.

Are you worthy?

 

epic

 

I can not see a man beating down by such an object of disgust. A fellow Texan at that.

Should you be willing to allow me a chance to do battle, I will honorable pay shipping. my assurance... it will be dealt with harshly, it's skin ripped from they body, it's guts, manipulated in ways Marquis de Sade WOULD BE PROUD.
I offer this service to you, in the Name of Super Hawk.

Respectfully'

A guy looking to try his hand at a custom seat.

 

I've got one too. I keep it locked away in the attic like Mr. Rochester's wife in "Jane Eyre". No one knows about it and no one ever will.

 

Works great for track days though! The Sargent's corners tend to dig into the leg when hanging off.