Roommates suck
11-05-2012, 08:03 PM
#1
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SuperBike
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Join Date: Mar 2007
Location: Belgium, WI
Posts: 1,611
Roommates suck
I can't post this anywhere else, and someone has to get a laugh. My sister moved in with me about 3 months ago. She is a middle twenties disaster, and she was at one of those points where she needed a break. So here is what I did:
No rent
She pays for all food.
Must clean house
Supplied car (so she can be somebody by having a job)
Covered her under my insurance because she is a disaster
Car broke down, not worth repairing. she borrowed my dads car because she didn't want to take another of mine. Had to loan my dad my car and revert to the backup backup car which just got fixed.
What she did:
Cleaned my house 3 times in the last 3 months (admittedly more than I would have, but not really what I was expecting)
Repeatedly entered my room to "clean" after explicitly being told not to do anything in my room.
Bought about $60-80 in groceries a week (I have about 20 boxes of cereal now).
Locked me out of my house (I dont lock the garage entrance ever) and told me some one must have done it. Woke up the following morning and lost her keys and blamed me, accusing me of hiding them on her for locking me out. She found them in the cupboard where she just was 20 minutes before.
Now, I am the type to forgive this type of lunacy being a dude that grew up in a family with 5 sisters. Nothing new. My dad explained her locking the doors with "you know, the mice..." as we have had two recently.
Now here is the good part, I come home today after her being gone for a very peaceful 2 days. 7 pm, she is making her dinner, all doors with dead bolts thrown. She hears me come in the garage, doesn't open the door (I actually think she threw the dead bolts when she heard me). I luckily, after being locked out previously at 1:30 and debating sleeping in a car in 30 degree weather, put a set of keys in the garage. Unlock the door, she won't look at me or reply to my hello. She wont answer why she dead bolted the door. She will only communicate via text (reminding you that we are in the same house) or by calling my dad to tell me whatever bullshit she has to say. Here is the great part, she is moving out. So, sounds like I win in this one, although my dad has placed the blame of this one on me for not being accommodating. Anyone want the same deal she had (BTW, 1875 sq ft, 3.5 car garage, 7 year old home)? j/k No more nice guy.
No rent
She pays for all food.
Must clean house
Supplied car (so she can be somebody by having a job)
Covered her under my insurance because she is a disaster
Car broke down, not worth repairing. she borrowed my dads car because she didn't want to take another of mine. Had to loan my dad my car and revert to the backup backup car which just got fixed.
What she did:
Cleaned my house 3 times in the last 3 months (admittedly more than I would have, but not really what I was expecting)
Repeatedly entered my room to "clean" after explicitly being told not to do anything in my room.
Bought about $60-80 in groceries a week (I have about 20 boxes of cereal now).
Locked me out of my house (I dont lock the garage entrance ever) and told me some one must have done it. Woke up the following morning and lost her keys and blamed me, accusing me of hiding them on her for locking me out. She found them in the cupboard where she just was 20 minutes before.
Now, I am the type to forgive this type of lunacy being a dude that grew up in a family with 5 sisters. Nothing new. My dad explained her locking the doors with "you know, the mice..." as we have had two recently.
Now here is the good part, I come home today after her being gone for a very peaceful 2 days. 7 pm, she is making her dinner, all doors with dead bolts thrown. She hears me come in the garage, doesn't open the door (I actually think she threw the dead bolts when she heard me). I luckily, after being locked out previously at 1:30 and debating sleeping in a car in 30 degree weather, put a set of keys in the garage. Unlock the door, she won't look at me or reply to my hello. She wont answer why she dead bolted the door. She will only communicate via text (reminding you that we are in the same house) or by calling my dad to tell me whatever bullshit she has to say. Here is the great part, she is moving out. So, sounds like I win in this one, although my dad has placed the blame of this one on me for not being accommodating. Anyone want the same deal she had (BTW, 1875 sq ft, 3.5 car garage, 7 year old home)? j/k No more nice guy.
11-05-2012, 08:24 PM
#2
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MotoGP
Join Date: Jul 2007
Location: NYC
Posts: 5,033
Funny story. In college I used to loan my sister my car & she would routinely return it at 5 knowing I start work at 4 and have a 45 min commute. Oh yeah and on empty or beyond, causing injector damage on my old car.
You gotta forgive, but usually its way easier to do so at a distance. You can still see the fam on holidays.
Maybe the spilled cereal brought the mice.
You gotta forgive, but usually its way easier to do so at a distance. You can still see the fam on holidays.
Maybe the spilled cereal brought the mice.
11-06-2012, 08:59 AM
#5
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SuperBike
Join Date: Dec 2005
Location: South Lake Tahoe, CA, USA
Posts: 1,689
It really is amazing how some people can take the best situation and turn it into a pile of rubble.
You can't help her. It's a good thing it was so easy to get out of the situation. Tell her not to bother with any more text messages. Maybe her government will take care of her.
You can't help her. It's a good thing it was so easy to get out of the situation. Tell her not to bother with any more text messages. Maybe her government will take care of her.
11-06-2012, 11:53 AM
#6
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SuperSport
Join Date: May 2008
Location: Central Fl.
Posts: 530
We are legion.
After three DECADES of malarky from my siblings I cut the cord and sent their canoes adrift in the current. You woulda of thought I committed capital murder from all the screaming and hollering (which I didn't respond to). Eventually the noise faded.
My life is SO much more peaceful now. And my wife is now doing the same to her sister. "Family isn't necessarily who you are related to, it's who you love."
Richard Bach
After three DECADES of malarky from my siblings I cut the cord and sent their canoes adrift in the current. You woulda of thought I committed capital murder from all the screaming and hollering (which I didn't respond to). Eventually the noise faded.
My life is SO much more peaceful now. And my wife is now doing the same to her sister. "Family isn't necessarily who you are related to, it's who you love."
Richard Bach
11-06-2012, 12:09 PM
#7
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Superstock
Join Date: Apr 2011
Location: Edwards AFB, CA
Posts: 491
I gotta be honest here, that sounds like what I did to my brother, minus the not speeking part. I was a piece of S**t when I was in my early 20's. So I Joined the Navy and now I realise how many years I wasted thinking the world was against me and did nothing about it. Take her down to an airforce recruter and sign her up! (lol)
11-06-2012, 04:59 PM
#9
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SuperBike
Join Date: Oct 2007
Location: Menifee, CA
Posts: 1,082
Nah, Squids right the airforce is like the Navy on land, great barracks, great food, not much work or worry cause you're not even close to the fight! The pilots are but not the ground support.
11-06-2012, 11:39 PM
#11
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Superstock
Join Date: Apr 2011
Location: Edwards AFB, CA
Posts: 491
They might come around, I did and I feel an endless amount of gratitude tward my brother and sister-inlaw. There is always hope. Just my .02 on the family thing, I hope things turn around for ya.
As far as the Navy thing. I love What I do and the people I work with, but I am a ground pounder and I see the Airforce and the higher quality living they have. Plus the boat life isnt for everybody.
As far as the Navy thing. I love What I do and the people I work with, but I am a ground pounder and I see the Airforce and the higher quality living they have. Plus the boat life isnt for everybody.
11-07-2012, 05:30 AM
#12
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MotoGP
Join Date: Aug 2006
Location: altoona, pa
Posts: 2,934
Sad........but not surprising. It's more the norm here today. While a few families have managed to remain tight, the majority seem to be failing at this, and many that have managed to maintain relationships are financially driven to do so.
That said, you may have made it work if you had done things a little differently and as a teacher you should have known this.........your primary means of communicating with her should have been text messaging, even when you're in the next room. With many young people today, this is your only option. Just think if you'd have texted her 3 min before you got home.....the door would have been open for you. text"I need to use the toilet now"...haha
Anyway, you win, she's out of there...... unless you wanted to spend the remainder of your life failing as a teacher thereby destroying your own positive self concept. Regardless of your bests efforts at remediation, there's no hope of meaningful change or desired outcomes for most of this population, mainly because they rationalize everything to come out the way it feels most comfortable to them.
So, writing off the whole bunch may be the only way to save yourself mentally and emotionally..
That said, you may have made it work if you had done things a little differently and as a teacher you should have known this.........your primary means of communicating with her should have been text messaging, even when you're in the next room. With many young people today, this is your only option. Just think if you'd have texted her 3 min before you got home.....the door would have been open for you. text"I need to use the toilet now"...haha
Anyway, you win, she's out of there...... unless you wanted to spend the remainder of your life failing as a teacher thereby destroying your own positive self concept. Regardless of your bests efforts at remediation, there's no hope of meaningful change or desired outcomes for most of this population, mainly because they rationalize everything to come out the way it feels most comfortable to them.
So, writing off the whole bunch may be the only way to save yourself mentally and emotionally..
11-07-2012, 09:17 AM
#14
Well take off, eh.
SuperBike
Join Date: Jun 2012
Location: QC, Canada
Posts: 1,201
One thing we all need to remember. Family is imposed on us, but friends we chose.
If it doesn't work out with the family, you have an excuse not to work
at it. Many times friends will be much more reliable, honest, punctual and forgiving then any family member will ever be.
My words may be harsh, but after seeing my ex's two sisters go, and my curent girlfriends bro/sis situation, wow, what a bunch of lost souls.
If it doesn't work out with the family, you have an excuse not to work
at it. Many times friends will be much more reliable, honest, punctual and forgiving then any family member will ever be.
My words may be harsh, but after seeing my ex's two sisters go, and my curent girlfriends bro/sis situation, wow, what a bunch of lost souls.
11-07-2012, 03:30 PM
#16
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Back Marker
Join Date: Apr 2009
Location: San Antonio, Tx.
Posts: 181
Well, HRCA#1, i would have to disagree with your statement. After 24 yrs in the USAF, as both a TACP (forward air controller) & RED HORSE combat engineer, i have not only been on the ground with the TROOPS, i've been in front of them waiting to catch up. Google RED HORSE & see what we do.
11-07-2012, 05:10 PM
#18
Senior Member
SuperBike
Thread Starter
Join Date: Mar 2007
Location: Belgium, WI
Posts: 1,611
Sad........but not surprising. It's more the norm here today. While a few families have managed to remain tight, the majority seem to be failing at this, and many that have managed to maintain relationships are financially driven to do so.
That said, you may have made it work if you had done things a little differently and as a teacher you should have known this.........your primary means of communicating with her should have been text messaging, even when you're in the next room. With many young people today, this is your only option. Just think if you'd have texted her 3 min before you got home.....the door would have been open for you. text"I need to use the toilet now"...haha
Anyway, you win, she's out of there...... unless you wanted to spend the remainder of your life failing as a teacher thereby destroying your own positive self concept. Regardless of your bests efforts at remediation, there's no hope of meaningful change or desired outcomes for most of this population, mainly because they rationalize everything to come out the way it feels most comfortable to them.
So, writing off the whole bunch may be the only way to save yourself mentally and emotionally..
That said, you may have made it work if you had done things a little differently and as a teacher you should have known this.........your primary means of communicating with her should have been text messaging, even when you're in the next room. With many young people today, this is your only option. Just think if you'd have texted her 3 min before you got home.....the door would have been open for you. text"I need to use the toilet now"...haha
Anyway, you win, she's out of there...... unless you wanted to spend the remainder of your life failing as a teacher thereby destroying your own positive self concept. Regardless of your bests efforts at remediation, there's no hope of meaningful change or desired outcomes for most of this population, mainly because they rationalize everything to come out the way it feels most comfortable to them.
So, writing off the whole bunch may be the only way to save yourself mentally and emotionally..
I am fairly certain that you are being rude towards me here...and I did try talking to her, but she wouldn't reply. That is when she texted me. Oh well, now I can sit around with my ***** out.
11-07-2012, 05:47 PM
#19
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MotoGP
Join Date: Aug 2006
Location: altoona, pa
Posts: 2,934
In this case, if there is any chance of getting through to her, as in the role of a teacher or more of a mentor maybe, it would have to be on her terms, thus the reference to texting, but more of a joke for sure, because I believe that the chances of remediation for these types are slim to none.
11-07-2012, 06:17 PM
#20
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SuperBike
Thread Starter
Join Date: Mar 2007
Location: Belgium, WI
Posts: 1,611
sorry if you think that, but that was not at all my intention. What i am saying is that most of these people are narcissistic, non-empathic individuals who have neither the desire nor the understanding to appreciate what someone like you is doing for them. In other words, it's all about them. They cannot see through the eyes of another, only their own perspective counts....selfish and undisciplined.
In this case, if there is any chance of getting through to her, as in the role of a teacher or more of a mentor maybe, it would have to be on her terms, thus the reference to texting, but more of a joke for sure, because I believe that the chances of remediation for these types are slim to none.
In this case, if there is any chance of getting through to her, as in the role of a teacher or more of a mentor maybe, it would have to be on her terms, thus the reference to texting, but more of a joke for sure, because I believe that the chances of remediation for these types are slim to none.
11-08-2012, 08:27 AM
#21
Senior Member
SuperSport
Join Date: Mar 2006
Location: Pa
Posts: 734
Never Easy
My buddies have given me support & great friendship & info over the years
Some stuff - U accept peeps for who they are, or not at all.
This is tough for families (all families have issues). I'm the youngest of 4 brothers. One brother died in the mid 90's (I still miss him - RIP Bro) another I'm pretty much his Dr. Phil. While he gets tiresome many times, he's still my bro & would always get my back.
One of my uncles is a bit wacky and for many years I was one of the few who talked to him, but after his father died (my Grandpa) and the way he treated some in the family, I cut him off. I have no tolerance for people that do not have respect for others.
Communication is key in any relationship & w/ ur sister texting U instead of talking is ******* cowardly, maybe leave it at this. I'm ur bro & still love U, but call me when U grow up.
All the best
Some stuff - U accept peeps for who they are, or not at all.
This is tough for families (all families have issues). I'm the youngest of 4 brothers. One brother died in the mid 90's (I still miss him - RIP Bro) another I'm pretty much his Dr. Phil. While he gets tiresome many times, he's still my bro & would always get my back.
One of my uncles is a bit wacky and for many years I was one of the few who talked to him, but after his father died (my Grandpa) and the way he treated some in the family, I cut him off. I have no tolerance for people that do not have respect for others.
Communication is key in any relationship & w/ ur sister texting U instead of talking is ******* cowardly, maybe leave it at this. I'm ur bro & still love U, but call me when U grow up.
All the best
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